The Cat Spot

Lunch has never been my favorite meal of the day, but I do enjoy partaking with people I love. I have lunch because I have love. (So serious...) Minutes after officially withdrawing from the Kundalini program, I called my brother, Daniel. I wanted to have lunch. I told him to think of a place to eat. After a minor discussion between Daniel and his girlfriend, Hannah, they decided they didn't want Tex-Mex . Daniel was about to to perform an online food search, when Hannah's eyes widened and a name escaped her lips, "Marie Callender's." Daniel snapped his head at her with a look of, "Are you serious?" I paused and reflected on my curiosity of the place every time I drive past it. "Ok let's do it. I want to go there out of pure curiosity," I affirmed Hannah's suggestion. Daniel looked a little confused as if he couldn't believe we just made that decision and were actually following through with it. Deep down, he secretly wanted to go...

A few weeks ago I enrolled in a Kundalini Teacher Training program. Kundalini yoga fell into my lap when I arrived in Austin and got me through the rough beginning. The universe introduced me to a group of fascinating people and submersed myself in the world of healing. Everyone seemed to be a massage therapist, rake healer (I'm not a fan), or involved in other forms of healing work. I found my techniques to be different and efficient. It was fun for a while, but I craved diversity and had strayed from my true intention of moving to Austin...to make a puppet rap music video. Graduating from InVision , a school for psychics, I walked away with two very important tools: neutrality, and amusement. Then it hit me, I totally lost my amusement. Somewhere along the way I lost myself. I was so happy to have people to spend time with, I pushed my dreams, and amusement aside and down played my true self. I immersed myself in yoga and got myself back into energy work. I gave a couple energy...

Monday was a day of no expectations and effortlessness. Started the morning out with some kundalini yoga, followed by whatever I felt like doing after. I stayed with my brother for the weekend and to play my part, I put some music on and attempted to clean his kitchen. Dan came out of his room with a look of "I just woke up and have no idea what's going on, but I'm a little angry." He looked at me and asked what I was doing. He looked at my iPod that was playing and told me, "I'm was going to put my iPod on clean, so you are gonna have to find something else to do. I need to feel like I'm doing something with my day." I told him I could help, but he refused. A little confused as to why he wouldn't take my help, I headed to the room I was staying in. About ten minutes later Dan pops his head in the room and looks at me, "Sorry if I was rude to you earlier. I'm just not feeling very well." I found his behavior rather amusing and I ...

After traveling up the California coast and parking it in Seattle for a while, I finally felt ready to plant some roots and decided to make Austin my playground. Once upon a time earlier this summer, I left Chicago and embarked on an Odyssey to experience life, love, create, and really connect with people, and find the ones that I want to have on my team to create with and for when the Apocalypse happens. I found all those things, but not the way I initially wanted. I made some great connections in Austin, but there was one connection that I felt stronger than the others. He was the last person I saw when I left Austin back in July. I didn't put too much thought into it at the time but looking back I realized some things. I haven't connected with a man in that way in a very very long time, if ever. We were drawn to each other right from the moment we saw each other. He could really see me, and the conversations were always deep and meaningful. The way he looks at me made me f...

It’s strange being in Albuquerque now. So much has happened since my life here. I feel comfortable for the first time in years. I’ve finally owned my past. While my confidence is there, many emotions have been stirring. I believe it’s because I’m finally in a place where I’m strong enough to fully process and learn. It’s strange. Ever since I’ve gotten to Albuquerque, in the evening around the same time (6:00pm): Feelings of immense sadness My heart aches On the verge of tears but no release Desire for something more but unaware of what that is... It’s love, validation, and the need to be wanted by someone Is it strange that I’ve never made love? I think so...but I can explain. It all started when I was a young little thang I did what I was told and of course I complained, but for the most part I was pretty tame My mama use to tell me the ways of the world and how I had to work twice as hard because I’m a girl Don’t be too pretty, but always be smart, and that’s how you c...

While looking up things to do in New Mexico I discovered that there is a lake located in the Sangre de Cristo Range named Lake Katherine. I thought this would be the perfect place to hike to and spend the night. It would be Kathryn @ Katherine and I would have an epiphany while meditating on concepts of love, life, and being humble. (I was humbled alright) Samantha Monroe-Fellers is another wonderful friend in my life who allowed me to stay with her beautiful family in Santa Fe. (Her hubby Alex was at work) When telling her of my plan to hike to Lake Katherine (about a 14 miles round trip) and "find" myself, she sweetly gave me a look of "you have no idea what you are doing." "Well, that sounds great and all, but where are you going to sleep?" -Samantha "I'll just sleep where ever." -Me "Are you going to have a fire?" -Samantha "No, I'll just sleep on the ground and take it." -Me "You know there are wil...

After being in Austin for a few weeks, my creative energy pulled me to New Mexico. When New Mexico calls, I come. I met some fantastic people in Austin, but my work there was done, and I wanted to continue on my odyssey in my Odyssey. My amazing friend Corrie welcomed me to Albuquerque and allowed me to invade her space for the past weeks. We have known each other for an entire decade. Even though we haven't lived in the same area since we were sophomores in high school, we always had this ability to connect, no matter how much time had passed, or where we lived. Friends for life. At night we read from Women Who Run With The Wolves, by Clarissa Pinkola Estes, and discuss the different fables and how we apply them our lives. It's kind of our bible. My dad gave me the book after I graduated, along with a GPS. The man knows me better than I ever gave him credit for. New Mexico has brought out a part of me that I haven't been able to get in touch with for a long time. I ha...